Chapter One - Richard Lewis

Chapter One - Richard Lewis Chapter One - Richard Lewis

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to report everything we found to the landowner, who let people keep the common stuff, but nothing that good. But no, she wouldn't let us get away with it. She said if we didn't tell, she would. We were so angry with her. She disappeared when she was twelve. I miss her so much. I don't know if she would wised up, grown out of the black and white way she viewed the world. I like to think not. We need people like her. So what would Nancy do?" Confused, Nol said, "I don't know what you're talking about." "I'm going to play you a tape," Tina said. "You just listen." She stood, put the recorder on the bench and pressed the play button. As the tape began to turn, she and strolled to the other end of the garden to watch the first glow of the coming sunrise. Puzzled and not at all alarmed, not after the heart-draining fright he'd already had that night, Nol listened to Dharma's voice rumbling out of the recorder's tiny speakers. He bent close to hear. It sounded as if his uncle was speaking from long ago and far away, from those days when Madé Catra and Wayan Arini and Anak Agung Mantera were school children. Nol listened with intense interest to a part of his mother's life he'd never known. When Dharma related the account of her warung burning down, Nol had to force his fingers to relax. He was digging his nails into his own palm. Then came the events of Gestapu. Dharma's words acquired a different weight as he spoke of Mantera visiting the house when Catra was teaching at school. Now alarms begin to ring for Nol. Nol wanted to fling the recorder into the bushes, but it was too late. Each of his uncle's words burned like a drop of acid, each sentence stripped away a little of Nol's life as he'd always understood it, until he was stranded upon a bench in an upside down world he did not know, the dew cold against his feet. The city came awake with the sun, and the hospital stirred to full life, with nurses bounding to their morning shift and doctors energetically making rounds. Nol and Suti and Arini were allowed to see Putu, and when the nurse said Tina could not as she wasn't family, Nol firmly said, oh yes she is. They let her in. Putu was surrounded by machines, blinking and beeping and humming. Suti held his hand. She had on her brave face. Nol didn't know what kind of face he had on. He couldn't bring himself to look at his mother. He was the child she didn't want. He was not his father's son. He concentrated instead on his own son, indisputably his son, on that swollen bruised toothless bandaged head. The fingers of his right hand curled around an imaginary knife handle. The head nurse shooed them out after too short a time. Back in the visiting room, Suti told Nol she wanted to go home and get some things. Arini said she would stay and keep watch over her grandson. Nol drove Suti home, lost to his twirling thoughts. Mantera is my father. Raka my half-brother. Many of his life's mysteries and peculiarities were suddenly explained. At the house, Suti filled a small suitcase with an abundance of clothes and toiletries and towels for a stay at the hospital She said she'd take a taxi, that Nol needed to get ready for the ceremony. 162

"We're not going to drop this," she said. "Somebody has to pay for what they did to Putu and to our family." Nol nodded. "Somebody will," he said. The taxi shortly came and took her away. Old Mak was in the kitchen, confused, looking for the morning's rice that hadn't been cooked. Nol explained that Putu was sick and was in the hospital. "Who's going to do the offerings?" she said. Nol gave her money and told her to go the offering maker's at the market and buy some for the day. It was a task she could do, and if she got lost, neighbors would guide her home. She slipped the money into the fold of her sarong. "Mak," Nol said, "before the Red Berets took my father away, when my sister Wayan was a little girl, did Anak Agung Mantera come by and visit Mother?" In those deep vacant eyes sparked a fragment of shrewd memory. "He wanted her. It would never do. A prince with a common girl? She refused to go the palace, you know." But, Nol thought, he could force her into the granary and rape her. The man who fathered me, but not my Bapa. My Bapa was the man who whistled birds into his hands and silenced mobs and walked into ditches and who was taken away by the Red Berets. The man who fathered me put my Bapa on a list. Nol showered and dressed in his best sarong and blouse and headdress and slipped on his special agate ring. As he headed out the gate, a salesman in tie and pulling a wheeled case approached him. "Not now," Nol said. "You'll want to see this," the salesman said. "I'm selling essential foods at prices cheaper than anything you can get in any store. You can order online and I will deliver. It is the new way to shop." He thrust a brochure into Nol's hands. Nol scanned the text and pictures. His idea, stolen once more. And the thief on the cover, a full photo of his sleek and handsome face, the president-director promising prosperity to all those who joined the team, was none other than Gdé Raka. 163

to report everything we found to the landowner, who let people keep the common stuff,<br />

but nothing that good. But no, she wouldn't let us get away with it. She said if we didn't<br />

tell, she would. We were so angry with her. She disappeared when she was twelve. I miss<br />

her so much. I don't know if she would wised up, grown out of the black and white way<br />

she viewed the world. I like to think not. We need people like her. So what would Nancy<br />

do?"<br />

Confused, Nol said, "I don't know what you're talking about."<br />

"I'm going to play you a tape," Tina said. "You just listen." She stood, put the<br />

recorder on the bench and pressed the play button. As the tape began to turn, she and<br />

strolled to the other end of the garden to watch the first glow of the coming sunrise.<br />

Puzzled and not at all alarmed, not after the heart-draining fright he'd already had<br />

that night, Nol listened to Dharma's voice rumbling out of the recorder's tiny speakers. He<br />

bent close to hear. It sounded as if his uncle was speaking from long ago and far away,<br />

from those days when Madé Catra and Wayan Arini and Anak Agung Mantera were<br />

school children. Nol listened with intense interest to a part of his mother's life he'd never<br />

known. When Dharma related the account of her warung burning down, Nol had to force<br />

his fingers to relax. He was digging his nails into his own palm.<br />

Then came the events of Gestapu. Dharma's words acquired a different weight as<br />

he spoke of Mantera visiting the house when Catra was teaching at school. Now alarms<br />

begin to ring for Nol. Nol wanted to fling the recorder into the bushes, but it was too late.<br />

Each of his uncle's words burned like a drop of acid, each sentence stripped away a little<br />

of Nol's life as he'd always understood it, until he was stranded upon a bench in an upside<br />

down world he did not know, the dew cold against his feet.<br />

The city came awake with the sun, and the hospital stirred to full life, with nurses<br />

bounding to their morning shift and doctors energetically making rounds. Nol and Suti<br />

and Arini were allowed to see Putu, and when the nurse said Tina could not as she wasn't<br />

family, Nol firmly said, oh yes she is. They let her in. Putu was surrounded by machines,<br />

blinking and beeping and humming. Suti held his hand. She had on her brave face. Nol<br />

didn't know what kind of face he had on.<br />

He couldn't bring himself to look at his mother.<br />

He was the child she didn't want.<br />

He was not his father's son.<br />

He concentrated instead on his own son, indisputably his son, on that swollen<br />

bruised toothless bandaged head.<br />

The fingers of his right hand curled around an imaginary knife handle.<br />

The head nurse shooed them out after too short a time. Back in the visiting room,<br />

Suti told Nol she wanted to go home and get some things. Arini said she would stay and<br />

keep watch over her grandson.<br />

Nol drove Suti home, lost to his twirling thoughts.<br />

Mantera is my father. Raka my half-brother.<br />

Many of his life's mysteries and peculiarities were suddenly explained.<br />

At the house, Suti filled a small suitcase with an abundance of clothes and<br />

toiletries and towels for a stay at the hospital She said she'd take a taxi, that Nol needed to<br />

get ready for the ceremony.<br />

162

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