Crab Orchard Review Vol. 12, No. 2, our

Terez Rose
“Okay, the joke’s on me, and clearly everyone gets it but me. Do
you mind telling me where the grand faux pas is?”
“Baiser.”
“No, busy.”
“Yes, but it sounds like the French word, ‘baiser.’”
“Which means?”
“In the old literary sense, it means to kiss. But in current slang,
basically…”
“Basically what?”
“Well, it means ‘to fuck.’”
Kate buries her face in her hands. “Lovely.”
“So, how did they react?”
“Oh God, they just screamed with delight. Or shock. I don’t know.
The whole class was ruined. Even the next day, the students were
giggling and asking each other ‘Are you busy today?’” Carmen begins
to chuckle. Kate scowls. “It’s not funny, dammit.”
“Yes it is. It’s hysterical. And you’re probably the hundredth Englishspeaking
teacher to make the same mistake. It’s almost a rite of
passage.”
“Oh, so you’re saying you did it?”
“No, but the Volunteer before me did. I got the scoop from the other
English teacher at my school. But I did try to explain to all my colleagues
that I was a happy person. I described myself as une fille de joie.”
“A girl of joy? They had a problem with that?”
“Ah, but une fille de joie means something different in French
slang. I pretty much announced to the entire school administration
that I was a lady of the night.”
The beer Kate has just sipped sprays out of her mouth. This sets the
two of them laughing. “Have to tell you,” Carmen wheezes a minute
later, “I’ve had no trouble making friends here since then, that’s for
sure.” They sit and howl with laughter, ignoring the small crowd that
has gathered to watch the two eccentric white women lose control of
themselves.
The following day is Christmas Eve. Henry, another fellow
American, shows up to spend the holiday with Carmen and Kate.
They drive back to the marketplace, squeezed into the cab of Henry’s
rattling, dust-encrusted Toyota. While he searches for a car part,
Carmen takes Kate to Score, a supermarket that caters to the French
expatriate community. Kate discovers caviar, foie gras, cheeses by the
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