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FLORIAN - The Most Traveled Man on Earth

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I am very sorry you are not here. If you were, you would never leave it any more, except<br />

for our own part of the country, when the nest egg would have amounted to a bit of<br />

something.<br />

I went to see Madame Claws<strong>on</strong>, that good old lady ____ of the neighborhood who has<br />

her big awkward daughter with her. On seeing me enter, the garden[er] told Madame<br />

Claws<strong>on</strong> that her husband was coming – it seems that she was awaiting him. Madame<br />

Claws<strong>on</strong> in great excitement came to the door with open arms to embrace me, tears in her<br />

eyes. I was completely astounded, and my feelings not being as upset as hers, I was as<br />

calm as a marble statue, but she, recognizing her mistake, took three steps backwards and<br />

would have fallen <strong>on</strong> her back, her feet in the air, if the aforesaid big Miss and Miss<br />

Go____ had not caught her in their arms. Tears, laughter, vapors, an attack of nerves<br />

were the c<strong>on</strong>sequences of this decepti<strong>on</strong>. After a half an hour she somewhat regained her<br />

composure, and I took to my heels, feeling like a fool, without their having offered me a<br />

glass of water, or offered to have me return to be taken for a husband to the said lady,<br />

which I can do very well without.<br />

I go often to the Bush Tavern in my gig [?], for I have not been able to refuse myself that<br />

little present, which has naturally necessitated a horse to pull it, and a very distinguished<br />

bulldog. I also went to see the Reverend and Madame six miles from here. He is very<br />

annoyed with Florian, who has not written him. I offered him the c<strong>on</strong>solati<strong>on</strong> of my own<br />

case. All the ladies are very well.<br />

<str<strong>on</strong>g>The</str<strong>on</strong>g> Count and Countess de Barda are always the same, and they love you, they say this<br />

and I very much believe them.<br />

I also saw Miss Bartolori and other young ladies at the opera. I can’t remember their<br />

names any more, which proves that they are not dead. I stayed three m<strong>on</strong>ths at Tom’s<br />

Coffee House. Madame Tom and the Misses Tom are all fine people. It is incredible the<br />

love they have for you and your daughters.<br />

I have now taken an apartment near the bank, composed of a large __________, a little<br />

antechamber, a bedroom and parlor, where I dine and have breakfast. <str<strong>on</strong>g>The</str<strong>on</strong>g> good Madame<br />

de Froger writes me often. She is very well and her s<strong>on</strong> also. I hope that Joseph may<br />

have been able to hold back some funds from the Guadeloupe ______, and will send<br />

them to me, for her. I certainly wish, alas, that we had not left, nor Joseph. I need to be<br />

caressed by my nieces. I would also like to have my dear Laura here to play me the<br />

variati<strong>on</strong>s (which were much admired at Paris). I should also like very much to pinch the<br />

fat cheeks of my good Virginia. <str<strong>on</strong>g>The</str<strong>on</strong>g> head she drew for me is now in a fine book in red<br />

Morocco leather and hence mounted, as well as the landscape by my favorite Eliza, who<br />

they say is quite stuck <strong>on</strong> a handsome cockney. You see that I know all the news.<br />

Embrace all your girls very lovingly for their uncle Peter, except Azelia, whom you are to<br />

whip for me for changing. <str<strong>on</strong>g>The</str<strong>on</strong>g>se dear little girls, I love them with all my heart.<br />

I have seen Mr. Daws<strong>on</strong> several times, and I went there to see Madame, who told me she<br />

would be very pleased to see me, but she was not to be found at home, having spent<br />

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